On the 23rd of June , 2016
The people of the United Kingdom
And Gibraltar
Went to vote
On an issue that for some had been burning for years
The question in full - and unaltered - was - and I quote
Should the United Kingdom
Remain
A member of the European Union?
Or leave
The European Union?
It was the greatest democratic turnout in British history, I do not scoff
And when the time came to speak the British said
Fuck off
Fuck off

Campaigning had gone on for many a month
With debate and discussion on many a front
They’d argued they’d fought they’d smeared and pulled stunts
There was David Cameron.
Theresa May.
George Osborne.
Tony Blair.
John Major.
The BBC.
The British told them to fuck off.
The British told them to fuck off.

If you vote to leave, you’ll lose your job
Vote to leave, you’ll lose your home.
The ensuing recession will last for years
Said David Cameron.
Theresa May.
George Osborne.
And the Treasury.
Tony Blair.
John Major.
The BBC.
The Bank of England.
Mark Carney.
The EU. The IMF.
The US president.
Saint Obama.
Back of the cue.
Loads of celebrities.
Gary Lineker.
JK Rowling.
Benedict Cumbertwat.
Lord Adonis. Who the fuck’s he anyway?
The British told them to fuck off.
Seventeen million fuck offs.

They wheeled in the experts to tell us what’s right
They gave us the benefit of their foresight
To leave is calamitous, that’s definite.
Food shortages.
No medicine.
Planes grounded.
House price crash.
Half a million jobs lost.
Cost of £4,300 to every home.
Stock market collapse.
Riots.
No sandwiches.
There’d be an outbreak of super gonorrhea. They seriously said that.
Donald Tusk at the EU said it would be the end of Western civilization as we know it.
I’m not joking.
And one more thing.
If you vote to leave, that makes you racist.
The British told them to fuck off.
Seventeen million fuck-offs.

A General Election was finally called
I think you know where told them to go
We won’t have to hear from them ever again
From
Tony Blair
John Major
Jon Bercow
I can’t tell you how much pleasure it gives me to say that
Jo Swinson
LOL
All those MPs who switched parties without holding a bi-election
Chuka Umana
Sarah Wollaston
Anna Soubry
Not a Nazi
All the MPs who did the opposite of what they promised in their manifestos
Dominic Grieve
David Gauke
Ken Clarke
Philip Hammond
Oliver Letwin
Ed Vaizey - dick
All those patronising Labour MPs who know so much better than you
Emily Thornberry
Diane Abbot
Jess Philips
That weird one with glasses
Jeremy Corbyn (oh, bless)
Hilary Benn
Hilary’s a girl’s name. What’s that all about?
The civil service
The Bank of England
The People’s Vote
The EU
Most of Hackney
Bent judges
Guy Verhofstad
Emmanuel Macron
The commentariat
James O’Brien
Jolyon Moron
The BBC
Andrew Marr
Femi Weirdo
Aaron Bastani
Gina Miller
All the celebrities
Hugh Grant
Gay Lineker
Lily Allen
Steve Coogan
Nish Kumar - comedian
Lord Adonis - who the fuck’s he anyway?
The British told you fuck off.
17 million fuck-offs.